Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Frequency

Haven't written in quite some time - figured it was time again to start writing - why keep this "funny" to myself.
As many of you know, my parents moved into our extension 2 years ago. Last evening at supper time my husband and myself are having a quiet dinner when we hear a tv on and its really loud. We were wondering if it was dad but if it had been him the tv would have been muffled because of the door between our place and their's. We go down stairs figuring our tv in our bedroom had popped on. No, it was the tv in the washroom. Now this tv is only used when my husband is soaking in the tub with the jets going watching a football game  - that is why it is so loud.  We turn it down and turn it off. A minute later it pops back on.  I go out to visit my parents and to see if dad has been playing with remotes. We came to the conclusion that when dad turns on the tv in his bedroom it turns on the tv in my bathroom. Not sure why is there is no direct access to each tv and it has never happened in the 2 years they have lived there.  Around 9:30 last night my tv poped back on. I go visit dad and he is sitting in his living room. Figured my theory was gone but he said he had just went into his bedroom to turn on the tv as he was going to bed to watch the ball game.

WELL 3 this morning, dad woke to check the score of the game and guess what happened, my tv popped on. I turned the volume off and decided since I'm up I would go to the washroom. On the way out my tv popped back on again.  Come to the conclusion when dad turns off his tv it also either turns off my tv or turns it on.   At 6 this morning when I got up for the day the tv was on again - I just walked out and got a coffee. Not playing that game LOL

Monday, December 10, 2012

Something is BLOWING in the wind


I get into work this morning and realize I have to go to the washroom (#1) I sit and all of a sudden I feel something blowing on my "privates". It is blowing the whole time I am peeing. And it is icy cold. I'll I think (I think I actually said this out loud) "omg is there a rat in the toilot blowing on me". I finish and jump up all freaked out. Look down and there was no water in the toilot. It was air from the pipes coming up and blowing on me. THANK GOD. For those who know me, know that this was a dramatic moment in the washroom.

Monday, January 16, 2012

which shoe goes on which foot

I have a bad habit (or good to me) of taking my shoes of at work while under my desk. Just went to go to the printer and couldn't get my shoe on. Looked down and was trying to put the left shoe on the right foot. AND ITS ONLY MONDAY.
Started "Jillian Michaels - 30 day shread" It says I should loose 20 lbs in 30 days. I tell you, the first 4 minutes were a breeze. The next 16 minutes were pure hell. I kept saying I hate you Jillian. But after the 20 minute work out I felt good. Only have one pulled muscle in my shoulder - which is good for me. Back at it again tonight - I am thinking I should have lost 3/4 of a lb last night.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Montreal Canadiens and Xmas

My husband had seen a picture at Cosco last week of the Montreal Canadiens. It cost $299. + 15% tax. I say "you have no where to hang this picture" he has that all figured out. OK REALLY I have spent about $500 on him already but don't want him to know that. We didn't get the pic. Yesterday I was thinking about the pic and was trying to figure out how to get it without him knowing. I don't have a membership so have to rely on other people to buy stuff for me. I decide to take my "partner in crime" sister B with me and use her membership. Last night my 2 sisters living here and myself go out to supper so figure I would go after. Well doesn't my husband have to come to that area of town and goes to a restaurant down the road. His daughter text me and says they will wait for me to go pick up groceries after supper. No one ever wants to go pick up groceries with me. OK so I figure out plan B - L at work has a membership so on our lunch break today we go over to Cosco and get the picture. The think is about 4 feet high. I can't push the giant cart and see around it at the same time. So i push a foot or two then look out around the pic then I push a little further and stop to look. People are in a rush in cosco and there are alot of people to avoid with the cart. Men are looking at me with envy - women are looking at me like I'm nuts. We decide to stop for hot dog on the way out, only $1.50 for a dog and drink. WELL who knew it would be so hard to park a giant cart and picture. I am convinced someone is going to steel this master piece. I am like a moron pushing it in around the tables trying not to hit anyone in the process. We finally get to the car AND THE PICTURE WON'T FIT IN MY TRUNK. I have to put it in the back seat which means that I have to carry it up the elevator to my office because, someone might steal it out of my car (dam car got to go). Why didn't I bring the truck today. Would have made my life easier. Now I am figuring how to get it home. Today I have a eye appt on the way home so should I take it and lug it into the eye clinic with me. Remember it is about 4 x 3 maybe even bigger. Or tomorrow I could take it home but I have a hair appt - yet again, I could drag it into the salon with me. Why couldn't my husband want a pair of earrings like a normal person. NO go big or don't go at all is his motto and I have sure lived up to that one today.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Bring a warm coat and your saw

If you have been following my blog you know we have an issue with xmas trees every year. This year we have been so busy we hadn't had a chance to go purchase one so friday night past my sister (B), sister in law (Mary) and friend (Elsie) came to get their hair and nails done. As they walked in I told them we are going xmas tree shopping. We all pile into my husbands truck and take of. We are all telling our stories about xmas trees and are laughing so hard. I tell about the year I let my husabnd purchase the tree and it was a 4 ft high tree that he put on a black&decker box to make it higher and tipped over. The next day I got a $45 tree that was just the right size (the first one went flying through the front door at 1 in the morning the night before. Then there was the year the tree kept tipping over and broke all my decorations and at my xmas eve drop in everyone kept commenting on my funky decorations (all the broken one's in the back of the tree that I didn't take of). Or Elsie telling us that her father would drag her brother into the christmas tree farm in the middle of the night and make him hold the flashlight while he cut down the perfect tree.
So we go to the first place, Daves, where the trees are $22.99. It closed at 8:00 and it was 8:10. So we go to the next place where we all get out and argue with the guy. I kept saying I was only paying $25 for a tree and he wouldn't budge on $35 for the tree. So I say "ladies get back in the truck". I say, I'm going to Dave's and the tree guy say's "go to dirty daves". Ok, so now what to do - decide that when I go to COSCO the next morning will drop into Daves and get the tree. At thsi point decide to go to the market to get a few things. Well isn't there a tree sales guy there. I jump out with my partner in crime "B" and ask for a $25 tree. He shows me this poor tree that looks like it was raped by a deer. I ask about another and he says it is $35 and can't drop the price. I tell him my "E" story and then I tell him about my xbrother in laws in Newfoundland who would come there in the middle of the night and get a "free" tree for each family member. He then says his parents are from Newfoundland - we are really bonding but no go on the $25 tree. So we jump in the truck and head off. WAIT A MINUTE I SAY - there behind the trailer was a bunch of trees and I see my perfect tree. I jump out and my sister runs to get the guy. He says the tree is $30. I say "is your boss here" he says no. I say "well why can't you sell me the tree for $25 - he will never know. PLUS who else is going to buy a tree one week before xmas. There are approx 100 trees on the lot. At this point he says rather loudly "this tree is $30 but for you it is $25" I SAY START THE CAR AND THROW THE TREE IN THE BACK WE HAVE A SALE. After we left I look at the girls and say "I think he gave it to me to shut me up" I don't care though. I have the perfect tree in my living room.

Ladies Restroom and keys

I went to the ladies washroom this morning while at work - it is a common washroom on the floor that is shared by about 4 offices. I go into the stall and as soon as I sit down someone comes in and rushes into the stall next to me. The lady let out the biggest fart - if I didn't know better I would think it was a man in there. I sit there quietly and think instead of embarrassing her I will sit here and wait for her to leave but if she decides to do a #2 (which I wouldn't be surprised with the sound that came out of her) I am getting up and leaving. WELL she just pee'd but she got 3 helpings of toilot paper then when out TOOK MY KEY and never washed her hands. I got up rush, left and ran back to the office to tell my story. (yes I washed my hands first) I go in and there is the key on the front desk. Our receiptionist said that a lady from across the hall bought it in. Now I know who farted and left the washroom without washing her hands. I don't think I will ever be able to look at her again.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Eyes

I have been sick now for 8 days. On the 6th day I developed pink eye. I have been using drops for my eyes to help them heal. I just went to put some drops in my eyes and just when I was about th squirt the bottle I realized I had dristan (nasel mist) in my hand and not eye drops. Can you image the BURN I would have felt if I had done that.